The Chime of Eons - Deadly Salvage

"Dem Orkz got a Mek for a boss! Dat's just sad, dat is."

- Kaptin Bludflagg, Ork Freebooter (Dawn of War IIm Retribution)

"How does ork technology work? Not very well, half the time."

- Abraxas, on the Warseer Forums, September 2010

"Wot, this? Naw, I've had this fer ages. Of course the paint's still wet, it's me favourite. Sell it to ya if you like. One careful owner."

- 'Fingaz' Rutzeg, Deathskull Loota (Codex: Orks (4th))

"The best means of Attack is Defence, an' the best means of Attack is a really really Big One, right, with lots of Boys an' dead big shooty things an' what have ya."

- Ork Smartboy Derek Zog (Deff Skwadron)

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INTRODUCTION

WOTCHA OOMIES!

Welcome back to the Chime of Eons, an article series that can now be said to as old, hoary and worn out as the most jaded 40k ex-wargamer.

Its time, I think, for a fresh start. This series has gone through a couple of incarnations already. I started off with the intention of rating the "fluffiness" of the cards, discussing how well the game mechanics and depiction match the in-universe fiction of the assets involved.

This lasted a little while, but soon it got a bit repetitive, with me pointing out the silliness of the scale of the game, and the madness of jetbikes travelling through space, or of close ranged flying units getting the Ranged keyword.

We then dropped the scores, with the idea that we'd be talking more about the fluff of the game universe, as introduced by the cards. This worked well, I think, and was a move in the right direction.

Inevitably though, the growing card pool has meant that a lot of cards have similar concepts or background fictions to cards that have existed before. There's only so much you can say about various World Eaters cards, for example, before you start repeating yourself.

As an article writer I've found this has made a lot of card entries into "filler", where I desperately try to find something to say to fill up a paragraph, so that I can keep the image formatting on the page right. I noticed that in the last few articles I've been saying "I've said this before but..." and "Not much to say about this card" quite a lot.

This isn't fun to write or to read.

So from this article onwards, we're taking a new approach. I'm not even going to try to cover every card there is, nor to pretend there's something interesting to say about all of them. I'm not even going to mention the cards that would have been laden with filler text before.

Instead, we're going to pick out the highlights, and look at the lore associated with them.



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GORZOD!

Well, we're still going to look at the new warlord! It'd be mad not to! The cardgamedb community is now divided right down the middle as to who the best ork warlord is, with half in the Nazdreg camp and half in the Gorzod camp. Oh yeah, and apparently there's a warlord who does something with snotling tokens too.

Of the two, however, Gorzod is undoubtedly the greater joy for the fluff lover.

Gorzod is the warlord of looted vehicles. A looted vehicle is what it sounds like - something built by someone else, which has been claimed for the orks as their own.

In the Warhammer 40,000 hobby it was established very early on that orks have a knack for appropriating the tech of other races, and "orkifying" it. Orkish technology is, of course, incredibly ramshackle, unreliable and prone to malfunction. However, its also durable, easily customisable and - in its own orky way - very effective.

Looting has MOSTLY been an ork thing in W40K's history, but other factions have had a look in on looting on occasion too. Even the po-faced Eldar used to have access to looted vehicles, with the heyday of first edition sometimes seeing Harlequin colour-scheme Land Raiders searing the visual cortices of bearded wargamers across the UK.

The wargame has treated looted vehicles in various ways through the various game editions. At one stage ork looted vehicles were a properly bum deal - you paid the same points value as other factions, but you got an orkish Ballistic Skill of 2 in place of whatever (better) rating the unit had before. In other editions they've been treated as a generic "looted vehicle" rules template regardless of the model of vehicle you looted.

In short, in the wargame, there's never been huge mechanical incentive to play ork looted vehicles.

Of course, GW wargamers are not just wargamers, they're also miniature collectors, painters and modellers, and its the painting and modelling aspect of looted vehicles that made the concept popular.

Coming back to the LCG, Gorzod probably represents the first time in the IP's history that there is game mechanical incentive to use looted vehicles.

Its a slight oddity that he's limited to looting "non-loyal" vehicles, as its not as if a newly crewed stolen machine will have any former loyalties. This also keeps us off Leman Russ Battle Tanks (a loota's favourite), which are probably a darn sight easier to orkify than land speeders or land raiders.

One thing I do appreciate, however, is that the overall deckshapes that Gorzod produces give a very orky feel in play. When you have a game where you just throw down a big looted tank, and say "deal with that", you feel very orky. Its a shame you get the unfluffy situations where a Klaivex Warleader will turn up and slice a land raider in half, but I guess that fits in with the broader media trope of sufficiently sharp swords destroying tanks! Such things are possible in the Matrix, just ask the Wachowski sisters.

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ON SAIM-HANN AND PRISMS...
Eldar players are pretty excited by this pack, as the Warlord Cycle showed their faction less love than most received, and between Mind War and Saim-Hann Jetbike, shares in Eldorath are on the rise.

Let's talk about that jetbike first. I'm going to say Jetbikes In Spaaaaace, and then not complain about the games scale ever ever again. Probably.

Taking a unit and sticking it on a jetbike is very much reminiscent of the evolution of the Eldar rules in the wargame. The option to stick a jetbike under pretty much any character (Eldar or otherwise) was present in Rogue Trader, but then for a few editions the Eldar were mostly footsloggers, save for the occasional Guardians on Jetbikes. Then we saw Farseers and Warlocks on jetbikes, Aspect Warriors on jetbikes (ok, a jetbiking shrine of aspect warriors, rather than existing aspects taking up jetbikes), and so on.

The LCG now even lets you put Wraithguard on jetbikes, something the wargame never allowed for.

Saim-Hann, as any casual fan of the lore will surely know, is one of the major Eldar Craftworlds.

Translating from the Eldar language as "the Quest for Enlightenment" but IRL linguistically derived from the Celtic festival of Samhain (vide also Beltane for Biel Tan), Saim-Hann is renowmed amongst the Eldar for its wild and barbarous ways. Their colours are red and black, and their symbol is the cosmic serpent, a mystical creature that lives within immaterial warpspace and material realspace at the same time. The cosmic serpent could also be said to be an analogy for the Eldar Webway, existing as it does on the skein between these two realities.

Saim-Hann society is divided tribally into Wild Rider families, feudal hierarchies that feud with each other as often as they war with others. Saim-Hann was also one of the first Craftworlds to flee The Fall, and so maintains closer links than most with the relatively primitive eldar Exodite colonies.

Regarding the Fire Prism, this is also a Saim-Hann unit in the art, and you can see the cosmic serpent sigil on the right wing.

The Fire Prism is a unit that only made its way into the Eldar Army lists of the primary wargame in third edition. However, the Fire Prism (like the Wave Serpent) was in fact introduced prior to this in the Epic Scale game. The Epic Scale game, as implied by its description, takes place on a much grander level than the main wargame, with a single base representing a whole squad of tiny infantry, and the mainstays of the battle line being massive Titans.

The Fire Prism was a unit designed for that game, in that it was bult around the Eldar Epic army's overall theme of flexibility, concentration of force and mobility. The Fire Prism gave a combination of fast movement, hard hitting power and great range. One of the clever ways they made this more "Eldar" was to have Fire Prisms have the ability to link-fire: each Fire Prism gun had a great big crystal on the back, and the idea was that a Fire Prism could fire its big ass laser into the crystal of another Fire Prism, and the two (or more) would then concentrate force, allowing you to bring the firepower of all prisms to bear on one target, without risking more than one prism to exposure to the enemy.

When the unit transitioned to the standard scale wargame, the miniature changed in appearance, and notably the prism moved from the back of the gun to the front of the gun. The various game rules since have continued to give the idea of focus fire, but the execution has generally been poor - the mechanical identity and fictional concept was designed for a different game.

The Conquest LCG clearly runs into the same problem here - a heavy tank unit that can work more effectively in squadrons isn't going to work in a game where heavy tank units cost a whole turn's worth of resources, and where you have to find the card from amongst three copies in your deck. The execution here is, in a way, in keeping with the RL progression of the Fire Prism's rules-set: a forced fit to a different mechanical context, that entirely loses the flavour of the original depiction en route.

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UH... SHOULDN'T THAT BE THOUSAND SONS?
A little knowledge is the same as a little ignorance.

I've had it pointed out to me (by someone that I won't shame) that the card Prodigal Sons Disciple is a fluff error, as the correct name of the Tzeentchian Legion depicted is the Thousand Sons.

Actually, this card is entirely fluffy and wonderful.

The Thousand Sons, as many will tell you, were one of the original 20 founding Legions of Space Marines. Prior to the Horus Heresy they were censured by the Emperor for dabbling a little too much with magic and sorcery. At the Council of Nikea, the Emperor forbade the use of psychic powers within the Legiones Astartes (something that almost all modern chapters cheerfully disregard) and the failure of Primarch Magnus the Red and his Thousand Sons to obey this edict led to the Space Wolves being dispatched to punish them, and the infamous Burning of Prospero, homeworld of the Thousand Sons.

After the Heresy, and long after The Thousand Sons turned to Chaos, and specifically the worship of Tzeentch (God of Change and Magic) they began to suffer the consequences of their decision. Tzeentch is a god who loves mutation, and his favourite servants amongst the Space Marines were being often "blessed" with change in flesh and form.

Azhek Ahriman, sorceror, First Captain and Chief Librarian of the Thousand Sons looked on in despair at the corruption of his once proud chapter, and set upon creating and enacting a grand ritual that would halt this degradation.

The Rubric of Ahriman succeeded in one way, halting change, but at great cost. The vast majority of Thousand Sons were reduced to dust within their armour, becoming no more than damned spirits trapped within their wargear. While no longer subject to mutation, they were also cursed for all eternity. Only the Sorcerers of the chapter escaped this curse, and indeed they saw their powers and mastery of magic enhanced.

Magnus the Red was unhappy with Ahriman for this secret act and for its consequences, and in rage banished Ahriman and his cabal, setting him an impossible quest of atonement: to understand the mind of Tzeentch.

Now let's switch to a much more boring story: Amon was Captain of the 9th fellowship of the Thousand Sons. He found himself within Ahriman's cabal, and helped him cast the Rubric of Ahriman, and was banished alongside his master. His own goal, after this event, was to find away of undoing the Rubric, then give his brother marines rest in death. He formed his own group, The Brotherhood of Dust, to pursue this goal.

Ahriman and Amon eventually came to blows, and Ahriman turned the Rubric on Amon, reducing the captain to dust and condemning him to be another automaton. Ahriman took control of the Brotherhood of Dust and renamed them...

*cue drumroll*

The Prodigal Sons.

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THERE IS ONLY KRIEG
As all you clever people will know, Krieg is of course German for War. In the 40k universe, however, Krieg is a death world in the Segmentum Tempestus with an interesting histoy.

Krieg was once a prosperous Hive World, with a population of billions, ruled by a council of Autocrats. However, moral decay crept into the planet as the autocrats - fearful of losing their power to outside forces - fortified the planet to insane degrees. In 433.M40 the High Autocrat took the final step into heresy, declaring the planet was seceding from the Imperium.

Loyalists to the Imperium fought against this, but the secessionist cause had better numbers, and eventually only a single Hive under the direction of Colonel Jurten, of the Krieg 83rd regiment. Declining to allow Krieg to be in the hands of traitors to the Imperium, Jurgen took the steps of unleashing the hive's nuclear arsenal, plunging the world into a apocalyptic nuclear fire, followed by dust-shrouded nuclear winter.

Over the next 500 years, the loyalists engaged in The Purging, gradually taking the planet back a street at a time. In 949.M40 the planet was once again under Imperial control.

The planet remains toxic and near uninhabitable from the war, and will likely never recover. The Astra Militarum regiments that come from Krieg are called The Death Korps of Krieg, and are determined to atone for the sins of their planet by dying in battle for the Imperium. To maintain numbers, the Death Korps clone new soldiers from the Vitae Womb, a human factory that is seen as near heretical itself by the Adeptus Mechannicus.

Their tactical doctrine is simple: by being more willing to die for victory than those they oppose, all they need to do is fight a war of attrition until opposition cannot hold.

The card is absolutely marvellous. Perfect flavour text, perfect stats, perfect ability. Great job!

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NOT YOUR STAR TREK TELEPORTERS...
Teleportation in the 40k universe is something fun and worth looking at. Whereas in a lot of science fiction teleportation is an act of advanced science, with wibbly-wobbly techbabble explaining information transfer and matter reconstruction, 40k teleportation is basically a journey through warpspace, a mini-version of what spaceships do when they warp jump.

As you can imagine, this is quite dangerous. When human spacecraft travel through warpspace, they do so with the benefit of Gellar Fields, which keep warpspace out of a bubble of reality but which take tremendous power to maintain. To spend any significant length of time in warpspace without the protection of a Gellar field would be to invite death, insanity or even daemonic possession.

Teleporters forcibly shunt individuals through warpspace, and aim to minimise this risk by minimising the time spent in warpspace. This is the main factor limiting the range of teleporters. Of course, each race also has extra variations on this:

The Imperium is understandably cautious about sending troops through the realm of chaos, but knows that doing so can give a potent military advantage. They also know that the best shield against the warp is clarity of mind and faith in the Emperor. For that reason, even amongst Space Marines its generally only the veteran Terminator company that teleport into battle, as their minds are well trained and honed through years of service. Only the Grey Knights chapter uses teleporters more routinely, but as they're about as daemonproof as Imperial soldiers come, they can afford to take that risk. Astra Militarum troops aren't generally as resolute in their love of the Emperor or as strong willed as marines, so its rare to see a Guardsman platoon being teleported into battle. Its also recognised that teleportation isn't just a matter of technology, but also of psionics, so Imperial astropaths will chant spells to protect a teleporting squad on its journey.

Within the forces of Chaos, the benefit of Astropaths is absent (as you need the Emperor's soulbinding ritual to create these psykers), but Chaos has no shortage of skilled sorcerers, and warpspace is almost as much their home as realspace is. Even so, teleportations still go wrong: a sentient mind can still be torn to shreds by the powers it adores.

The Eldar, of course, are absolutely terrified of the warp. Hey, you would be too if you knew for sure there was a hungry Chaos God waiting to devour your screaming and conscious mind. The Warp Spiders, who use battlefield teleporters, suffer a horrifying level of attrition to their warp jumps, and are regarded as amongst the heroic, self-sacrificing and worryingly self-destructive of Aspect Warriors. Its little wonder that it is one of the smallest shrines! For general short range apportation, Eldar prefer portable webway portals, which use the far safer Webway capillaries to move about. The Dark Eldar, being obsessed with self preservation, don't really mess around with teleporters, even though they are likely technologically capable.

The Orks, naturally, break all the rules. They use warp-craft without gellar fields, they've weaponised teleporters in their shokk attack guns, and they've created interplanetary tellyporta pads that are absolutely impossible in physics, according to the scientists of other races.

Tau and Necrons, the oldest and youngest factions respectively, don't use warp-tech at all. Both have looked at it, said "yeah, no thanks" and found safer ways to move about.

Tyranids get the ickiest teleporters: they breed organisms that dwell almost entirely in warp-space, but have multiple worm like tendrils with sphincter cysts that emerge into realspace on board the hive ships. This is probably more akin to a localised version of the Eldar webway rather than true teleportation, but it is extrememly reliable, and comes with an extra safeguard of being able to "taste" anything sent down a canal, with any non-valid organisms dumped straight into the digestive tracts of the beast. Fun thing to do if you're aboard a hive ship - chuck a grenade down a cyst. The indigestion the explosion gives it may make the cyst cough up stuff that it hasn't been able to digest in the past - armoured warriors for aeons past, cool archaeotech, and so on. Or, of course, it might alert the Hive Ship to the foreign body in its midst, and bring a swathe of war organisms to your vicinity...

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CONCLUSION

My enthusiasm for this game waxes and wanes, but the LCG is getting better and better at depicting the 40k universe.

Its not so much in the fine detail that this game excels, but in creating a play experience that really gets to the heart of the over-arching moods and styles of each faction. Early on in this game's life I complained that the Astra Miliarum ought to feel like the faction of the great big swarm of expendable troopers backed up with some serious firepower, while the Eldar ought to be small in number but as hard to predict as the movement of mist, and so on. Conquest is capturing this really well, and doing so in a way that provides an experience that feels really fluffy, even if individual cards don't hold up to close scrutiny.

This is something FFG deserves credit for, I think: a great understanding of the shape of the W40K play experience, meeting that incredible challenge of an asymmetrical play experience with satisfying fiction, that is if not perfectly balanced is at least a game with the balance of power shifting frequently enough to maintain interest.