Qyburn's Dungeon - "Men He Rated Badly"

Qyburn's Dungeon - "Men He Rated Badly"

Qyburn's Dungeon is the place for Small Council members to come up with some truly twisted creations. This article series will be dedicated to producing some unusual decks that hopefully aren't being considered by the larger metagame, or else have some other more unique aspect to them. The Citadel may not approve, but we're not exactly at the Quill & Tankard here...

Important Note: the following is intended as a Joust deck, not a Melee deck. Players who predominantly favour Melee may not get a deck out of this, but will hopefully still be able to glean something from the article.


Over the last few weeks the core set reviews have been going up on this website, and I made a point with my reviews to be harsh where I felt it was required, or just to make a point about a card. However, there were a few cards I gave the harshest rating of all to, namely 1 out of 5, and I noticed something amusing - they actually have a synergy together.

I'm thinking, specifically, of Stannis Baratheon, Left, and Right. All, in my opinion, bad cards...but together? Clearly I'd managed to throw a gauntlet at my own feet. The opportunity to make a deck based around some 1 out of 5 cards was too tempting, and would allow me to make a larger point - just because a card gets a 1 out of 5 from me, it doesn't mean I think it's completely useless!

Note that you may disagree with these being 1 out of 5 cards - if you do, what better place to voice your disagreement than the Baratheon or Tyrell comment sections?

"A Boring Deck"

So first let's look at that synergy, and what it suggests. Stannis prevents more than 2 characters from being stood by each player the standing phase; Left and Right become efficient non-kneeling defenders when both in play at the same time, with the key synergy there being "non-kneeling". In order to get this synergy to work, we're therefore looking at a defensive build, so we need a way to actually win. Thankfully Baratheon is one of the two factions capable of sitting and stalling out for a victory in the core set, and that's because they are the fortunate holders of The Chamber of the Painted Table. With Stannis's effect naturally letting us leverage dominance victories thanks to our non-kneeling or standing characters, the idea of sitting back and letting dominance get us the victory is a strong one. What we're looking at building here then is a deck that can stop its opponent accumulating power too quickly, then stall out the game by winning dominance over and over. Fun, huh?

"Renly's Death Brought us Together"

This deck obviously needs to be Baratheon Banner of the Rose, as Stannis is loyal but Left and Right are not. So I guess this deck is based on the period of time after Renly was killed but before the Stormlands sided with the Lannisters? Let's pretend the Tyrells got over the betrayal instead, I guess. Along with Left and Right, what else are they bringing to aid Stannis's cause? Randyll Tarly seems an obvious fit, as someone who can stand and thus give us more of a presence for dominance. However to justify his inclusion we also need some STR boosts - fortunately Growing Strong is ideal here, boosting Left and Right for an entire challenge phase. We also have Heartsbane, which sits very well on Randyll as well as the Knight of Flowers, who is also worth an inclusion for being able to force through challenges single-handedly if required. Lastly, Maester Lomys is an unassuming fellow, but is advantageous to us here because his trigger works even if he is not in the challenge, giving us some nice residual stall.

"Other Bricks in the Stall"

So if we know what Tyrell is bringing to Stannis, what about Stan himself? Well he brings a bunch of devoted followers of R'hllor, for starters. Every single card with the trait fits perfectly into this build for one reason or another. Away from the red god we also have some excellent stall in the form of the Vanguard Lancers (JCWamma's verdict: 2 out of 5), Stannis's daughter Shireen who can provide some handy leverage at a key point while rounding out the cost curve, and Davos Seaworth who can ensure we always have a defender for military or power challenges. The Red Keep is also important here - the draw is obviously important, but that +2 STR also ensures that anyone who wants to win a power challenge against us needs to overcommit - playing into our Stannis-y, kneel-y hands. Consolidation of Power will keep our opponents knelt out nicely, forcing them to suffer to Stannis's harsh rule. Lastly Ours is the Fury is, besides being another card I rated lowly, one that also plays perfectly into our game-plan here.

"Always have Protection"

Now, the astute among you will have noticed this is a combo deck. If we can get make it reliable enough, a core set-only environment is actually a pretty ideal place to build it, because we can very easily keep track of literally every single threat. A big "answer" card in the core set is of course Milk of the Poppy. If an opponent gets one on Stannis, our deck falls apart! Good job we have Maester Cressen then, who answers the Milk as easy as can be. However, protection in this case doesn't just mean protection for the combo, but protection for the deck in the case of the combo misfiring. We can make the deck as reliable as we like, but an intelligent player will find a hole in the combo and disrupt it - or, if you don't know any intelligent players, you might just draw a bum hand on occasion. We need a back-up plan, and Baratheon has the perfect plan B, B for Bob. Robert Baratheon is an amazing card both with Stannis and instead of him - he takes Lightbringer at least as well, he combos with the swathes of knelt characters, he single-handedly wins games... He needs to go in the deck, in short. Between him, Randyll and the Knight of Flowers, we should be in a reasonable position even if and when Stannis's claim to the Throne falls through.

"I have no strong opinions one way or the other"

On the subject of the Throne, let's look at neutrals, and start with the Throne. This obviously belongs here, both as a back-up plan to win dominance and a counter to other peoples' Thrones. The reserve boost is also relevant, as we don't really want to be throwing out loads of characters each round when only two can stand. Bodyguards make sense with some important Lords and Ladies, though we're not so all-in as to run three. Seal of the Hand is also a sensible fit, giving us an extra character each round effectively, and helping us close games with renown - between that and Lightbringer, the power grab should actually be quite strong when we need it to be. Now, as part of protecting the combo we need to look at Stark, the faction that can get round our pervasive kneel. Robb Stark is enemy number one for this deck, and there are many removal approaches we can take, but ultimately the only one reliable enough for us here is Milk of the Poppy, the panacea of the core set. The only removal Stark has access to is Rattleshirt's Raiders - requires pushing a military through our defensive wall - and Confiscation - happens in the plot phase giving us time to work around it, and at least means they aren't confiscating our other attachments. Lastly, Roseroad and Kingsroad are obviously 3x auto-includes.

"Chamber Plots"

Our plot deck needs to do a deceptively large amount for us here - it has to help make our combo more reliable, give us outs, give us the economy to play what we need to, and perhaps most importantly, allow us to go second; putting the opponent in first where possible will allow us to use our non-kneelers most effectively, and also not over-commit on attack to leave ourselves vulnerable on defence. This means that, despite its high gold and our important lords and ladies, A Noble Cause has no place here. After all, who needs that when we can run Sneak Attack, that famous defensive plot? Sure it has 2 claim, but it limits our challenges while giving us the initiative, sounds defensive to me. If we need economy, there's always Calling the Banners anyway (JCWamma's verdict: 2 out of 5, worthy of a 1 in Joust), which should be able to reliably get us at least 6 gold and regularly more. Now, we do need to make some concessions to practicality at the cost of initiative - namely, finding pieces of our combo. With some important characters and locations, we need both Summons and Building Orders here. We also need some back-ups in case we don't draw Cressen or get him killed - a Milk of the Poppy on Stannis could be ruinous, so in comes Confiscation. We also need an answer if opponents manage to break through our defensive wall, and that means Wildfire Assault, which again has the high initiative we need. Finally we need to make a nod to actually winning this game, which means A Feast for Crows.


All that leaves us with the following:

"Men He Rated Badly"

House Baratheon Faction
Banner of the Rose Agenda

Plot: (7)
1x A Feast for Crows (Core Set)
1x Building Orders (Core Set)
1x Calling the Banners (Core Set)
1x Confiscation (Core Set)
1x Sneak Attack (Core Set)
1x Summons (Core Set)
1x Wildfire Assault (Core Set)

Character: (31)
3x Dragonstone Faithful (Core Set)
3x Fiery Followers (Core Set)
3x Left (Core Set)
2x Maester Cressen (Core Set)
1x Maester Lomys (Core Set)
3x Melisandre (Core Set)
1x Randyll Tarly (Core Set)
3x Right (Core Set)
2x Robert Baratheon (Core Set)
1x Selyse Baratheon (Core Set)
1x Ser Davos Seaworth (Core Set)
1x Shireen Baratheon (Core Set)
3x Stannis Baratheon (Core Set)
1x The Knight of Flowers (Core Set)
3x Vanguard Lancer (Core Set)

Attachment: (5)
1x Heartsbane (Core Set)
1x Lightbringer (Core Set)
2x Milk of the Poppy (Core Set)
1x Seal of the Hand (Core Set)

Event: (8)
2x Consolidation of Power (Core Set)
2x Growing Strong (Core Set)
2x Ours is the Fury (Core Set)
2x Seen In Flames (Core Set)

Location: (16)
2x Chamber of the Painted Table (Core Set)
3x Dragonstone Port (Core Set)
3x The Iron Throne (Core Set)
3x The Kingsroad (Core Set)
2x The Red Keep (Core Set)
3x The Roseroad (Core Set)

Note: It's worth again pointing out that this is intended as a Joust deck, not a Melee deck. I think an idea like this could work in Melee, but it would need more emphasis on the pro-active route to victory, because stalling three opponents for enough turns to win from dominance while they can also attack each other, that's undeniably tough.

With 12 Tyrell cards we just sneak over the line of the Banner's deckbuilding restrictions. There aren't enough to justify the Tyrell reducers, either the Rose Garden (more limited economy) or the Garden Caretaker (we want to avoid too many reducer characters here because of Stannis). Our resources are slightly on the precarious side, with 9 limited locations, 3 reducer characters and 0 Littlefingers; however, with our plot resources being reasonably high on the whole, we should be okay in this regard - do watch out for Naval Superiority though, as other than Sneak Attack (and the when revealed gold of Calling the Banners) our entire plot deck is vulnerable to it.

This deck is somewhat "top-heavy" with regards to characters. This is a deliberate choice, as we don't want a stacked board on our side, and with Left and Right on the table we are looking to create something of a military wall, stopping opponents from easily pushing through claim. Conversely, this deck almost never wants to make a military challenge unless it's pushing for the win, as an opponent will often just kill a knelt character they can't stand in the standing phase. Much rather have them stuck knelt on the board to empower Robert and Calling the Banners.

It's worth observing the weaknesses of this deck. With a stall deck the temptation is to say a Night's Watch match-up would be bad, with The Wall collecting power for them - however, with Chamber of the Painted Table stealing one and gaining a power for dominance, we will actually accrue power slightly quicker than them. No, our big weaknesses are Stark and Greyjoy. Stark offer the ability to stand with frustrating regularity - Robb Stark is a real danger, but in particular Grey Wind needs to be knelt where possible, as he cannot be given Milk of the Poppy and can chomp a weenie to stand Stark's entire board. Greyjoy's main outlet will be Balon Greyjoy, as often Balon will be getting unopposed all by himself - and the We Do Not Sows that that implies, clearing out our dominance engine.

Otherwise, the biggest weaknesses we have are Heads on Spikes - nothing will annoy you more than getting a duped Left on setup, only to draw back into Right and have him Spiked plot one, and that's not even the most catastrophic interaction the plot can have with the deck - and Targaryen decks looking to throw a Dracarys! your way - be very wary about making challenges unless you've seen the opponent's hand in flames.

This deck may lack some measure of interaction at times, but that wasn't the goal here - the goal was to create a strong unusual deck out of cards I rated poorly, and I think if nothing else we can all agree that this deck will be Tier 1 (out of 5).

Had any experience playing a deck similar to this? Got any thoughts on the article or deck, or any ideas for future creations from Qyburn's Dungeon? Please post in the comments below!


JCWamma is a first edition veteran of three years who was also one of those players who tested the second edition core set. He has been fortunate enough to enjoy some modest success in the UK Tournament scene and loves the game enough to have made the deep-dive into understanding the rules, having judged at Stahleck every year since 2013. Not being loyal to any one house or faction, he instead enjoys decks that exist 'in the margins' of the established meta.